Sunday - Starting All Over

My hormones are equaling out and the miscarriage is completely over.  It was a scary ordeal this time.  I ended up going to the ER on a whim and the Dr informed me had I stayed home I would have bled out and died.  DH was 8 hours away at training and no one would have come to the house to check on me until he came home three days later.  By the time anyone heard my son crying in his crib I would have been long gone.  I really feel like God forced me to dial 911.  I felt fine and kinda felt silly for calling, but it turns out my body would have just kept slowly bleeding had the Dr not intervened.  So, needless to say, I am grateful to still be here and grateful for the still small voice that said "call anyways...just to be safe."  That is the good news...

The bad news is that I now weigh more than I did when I started Weight Watchers before.  I'm a bit bummed about that, but I was pregnant and it was a very stressful month and half waiting on my body to complete the miscarriage.  Life happens and all I can do is keep trucking on.  Weight Watchers' way of weight loss is not a fad, it's a lifestyle change.  I will be measuring my food and watching my portion control for the rest of my life.  I'm obese right now because I didn't do that as I grew into adulthood.  It's simple.  Eat healthy foods; use correct portions; and exercise.  Even my stick thin husband gains weight if he pigs out.  Some people feel like they are being punished for being fat and that they have to measure all the time now... it's just not true.  Eventually everyone will gain weight if they eat too much food.  I just gain easier than my husband because my activity level and metabolism is lower.  I don't move around nearly as much as he does so I can't afford to eat as much as him.

Anywhoodle... I rejoined Weight Watchers with a brand new account so I don't have to see my old data.  I have come to accept that I gained back that weight (and more) and I know I can do it again because I did it before!  This first week was hard.  I gained again and I was hungry... but this second week is going better.  I may gain again this week but it won't be as much and I'm not as hungry.  I can do this, again and again if I have to, but I can do it!

Oh and I am rewarding myself for the 50lbs I have lost already with something extra special this coming Saturday because it was hard work and I should celebrate!  I'll share that with you soon!

Saturday - Undone

I am 1.7lbs away from undoing everything I have done with Weight Watchers.  I began at 222.8 (wearing jeans and tank top) and am now 224.4lb.  Today, without any clothing, I weighed in at 220lbs.  *sigh*  I have gained 10.6lbs since finding out I was pregnant three months ago.  I haven't been eating the best I could be, but I haven't been completely overeating either.  I suppose about 11lbs in three months would only be a little less than a pound a week.  It's still a bit discouraging though.  On the one hand I'm not looking forward to going through the physical and emotional pain of a miscarriage, but on the other I'm ready to be done with all this so I can move on and start getting back to a healthy weight again. I need to start tracking more carefully again, but I still find myself needing comfort, and of course I turn to food.

Saturday - 11 lbs in 6 Weeks

I figure I have 6 weeks before my Dr decides I should stop doing WWers (or at least before he has me add a snack in each day which will put me over my points). This means I have 6 weeks to stay on plan and lose a bit more weight.  I am a mere 11lbs away from being under 200lbs.  I've already lost 5% of my total body weight which lowers my risks for weight related disease significantly.  Each lb I lose now is just that much more healthy baby and I will be.

If I can lose 2lbs a week by adding more veggies and lean meats to my diet and cutting out the fried fish and chicken then I can be under 200lbs for this pregnancy!   {I tend to buy already cooked frozen foods since they're fast... but they're not very healthy.}  Wouldn't it be awesome to weigh less at the beginning of this one than I started at with my son's?  Think how much healthier I'll be carrying around baby.  I can do this!  I see my nutritionist on Tuesday and I can't wait to ask her some worrisome questions I have about the "pregnancy diet" I'll have to start after 12 weeks... like do I really need 6 servings of grains a day or can an obese mom-to-be eat less than that?  Breads are my downfall.  I can nibble a sweet and be satisfied but I can't eat just one bite of bread.  If I have more than my two slices of toast and maybe 1 pasta WW meal a day I tend to go overboard and eat 10 points worth of bread.  I'll let you know what she advises!

Saturday - Hanging In There

I'm still hanging in there... I didn't lose any weight this week according to my at home weigh in.  My Weight Watcher's weigh in showed a 0.8lb loss.  Not stellar... but neither was my exercise this week.  I've been busy getting the garage cleared out before it snows, which is supposed to be TOMORROW by the way...  It's not done yet, but A.L.M.O.S.T!  It has been so hard getting all those boxes unpacked and everything sorted into keep, toss, donate, and sell.  I was finding papers dating back to 1st grade!  I have everything sorted now, save about 6 boxes; it just needs to be brought inside and upstairs or taken to the donation center.  Some of the boxes coming inside are REALLY heavy so I'm not looking forward to that, but it will be a great workout.  I really need to find a workout to do when I'm done unpacking boxes and moving furniture.  It won't be long {hopefully} before I am done getting the house settled and then what will I do?  I bought a kettle bell, weight ball, and trampoline today.  Hopefully I'll be able to work out with those everyday when it gets too cold to be outside.

Oh and I have BIG news to share but not just yet... when I am ready though, YOU will be the first to know.  All those readers on my Hippo with a Headband site will just have to hop over here if they want to know what's going on. Teehee!  Well, time to get some more work done.  I don't have much longer before it'll be too late to get the garage and upstairs finished.

Wednesday - A Week of Discipline

I've decided to dedicated an entire week to eating discipline.  Last Saturday after my weigh in I filled out my dinner online and realized I was at exactly my daily limit.  Right then I decided to challenge myself to stay at or below my daily point limit for the whole week and not use any of my weekly point allowance.  I have been able to keep it up for 4 days so far but I've been hungry every day.  I suppose that's not such a bad thing if I am getting enough liquids, fruits, veggies, and protein each day.  It's just really annoying!  I weighed myself this morning and I was down 1.4lbs.  I've been losing 1/2 to 1 lb a week since being on Weight Watchers.  I just don't know if the extra 1/2 lb a week is worth feeling hungry every day. I haven't been able to concentrate on work or cleaning the house this whole week which is quite annoying too.  I guess I need to decide whether I want to get to my goal weight or get my house in order first.  Maybe the hunger will even out if I continue sticking to my daily point limit and eventually I won't be hungry all the time...

Saturday - Gained This Week

And you know what?  It's okay!  This is the first time I have gained weight since starting Weight Watchers and I am encouraged. {Yes, encouraged.} It means that WWers is working for me, because, as you can see, I did not follow the plan last week.  I tried something different and it didn't work for me.  I have learned my lesson and can move forward.

All I need to do is stick to the plan and I will lose weight.  If I can get myself to add daily exercise I'll lose even quicker.  My current goal is to lose 5lbs a month but it would be AWESOME if I could lose closer to 8-10lbs a month until I get closer to my goal weight.  I have exactly 70lbs left to lose, which means I have lost a total of 50lbs!  Not too shabby I'd say.  No, this obviously isn't the least I've weighed during this process, but it's just that - a process, and gaining is a part of finding out what works well for your body.  This week I am planning on eating WWers meals to work on my portion control and see how that goes.  They all range from 6-8 points which gives me plenty left over each day to eat snacks in the mid-morning and afternoon.  I'm looking forward to seeing a nice big loss next Saturday.  Wish me luck!